1 year to declutter???

I'm sure all you very clean and neat people with your houses that are not at all cluttered cannot understand those of us who have clutter; we exist.

I first tried to Feng Shui my house and that worked in part; at least I put color on the walls where I might have left them light yellow like I usually do. But beyond telling me to move this piece of furniture over there and do X, Y, and Z. I"m not sure the Feng Shui practitioner that came to my house gave me the tools to de -clutter.

Every time I try, I end up with a bigger mess and feel slightly annoyed (well, more than slightly annoyed) by the mess. It's funny, I don't mind living in a little bit of clutter, but now that I've started this process, I can't stand the clutter.

Okay, so every book that I've read about why de-cluttering your house is good for you and your family, not one tells you how to do. Not really. Start small, tackle one project at a time is what they say. I don't know how to organize. That I can handle, but when you've lived in (closet) clutter you don't understand what comes naturally to other people.

I used to joke that my house clean was other (really neat) people's house messy That probably holds true.

I've started to read a different book. Actually, what started this was a lecture I heard in Church about taking back your time. It made me think, how do I lose time? I'm always stating to my kids that if they just do things when asked or put their shoes, boots, coats, back packs, etc where they belong they will have more time. But how do they learn that if I don't know how to do that.???

So this new book; 12 months to de-clutter (or something like that) goes room by room. BUT what it does (that I've not seen in other books) is it makes you think about your family of origin and journal. Thinking about how your family dealt with the things in the house is really actually, well, eye opening. My mom is staying with us and while I"ve not learned a ton about her, I've learned a lot about why I say and do certain things.

So, the first chapter was to start a journal (this is going to be it). It's about the family of origin. I'm not going to answer the questions tonight because this is just the start of it.

But the second thing (that occurs in the first week in addition to the journal) is that you have to start two new habits in the kitchen. Mine are: empty the dishwasher (my least favorite task; it ranks just slightly higher than cleaning out the cat box or the frog cage) when it is done and to wash the dishes as soon as they are used. Okay, for most of you this sounds like an easy task. For me, it's not. It's really not. It's actually quite hard. But I am on a mission. Not as exciting as cooking the entire Julia Childs Mastering the Art of French Cooking but then again, I'm not a writer and I have learned to hate cooking, but it will be oh-so-exciting for me.

For people like me, learning to establish the routine is hard. I can purge my junk with the best (if I had the time), but organize it? Organizing the furniture? I've no idea how to do that.

So armed with the only tools I have available (the book and my determination) I set forth bravely to go where many clutter fools have attempted to go... the dismal abyss of our messiness.

One year to an organized life (Leeds). Here I come. I think it should count when my mom or my son do the dishes; after all they got done didn't they? And it's 21 days until something becomes a habit, so I've added a task count at the bottom of the page. After 21 days, I think it should be second hat to hang my keys, put my dish in the dishwasher.

And I yes, I admit (with shame) I used to make fun of the people who always had a perfect house (while secretly admiring the neatness of their house and feeling envious), who seemed anal about putting away their clothes after taking them off (Me, I hang them on the end of the bed until I can no longer see the dresser or they fall off into a heap before I hang them). I thought how does that work? And that is the piece I've come to realize; it is work, but it's work that takes less time if you do it when it needs to be done instead of trying to do it later.

and that is it for tonight. It's late and I have to work.

So 21 days to habit; 365 to a de-cluttered house.

long time no post

long busy summer.

no time for blogging.

who ever thought that de-cluttering a house would be easy. I think it is easy for the people who are already neat. But those of us who really need to de-clutter make a larger mess in the process.

let's see since May:

Alex returned from India (8/1); left for K-zoo

Mom visited; having eye surgery and will be here until December.

Ex-husband gave up most of his time with the kids in July and August. his wife returned from N.M. for two months and is now headed back to NM.

Josh applied to college.

Both little kids had a birthday. LEarned to ride a bike and read. They both attended summer school.

and we got two water frogs and an Italian Greyhound named LeFeviere. I have no idea what it means, but the kids love saying it. I think it either means, I'm on fire or I'm all fired up. But it's a cute little rat dog.

Mother's Day

Mother's Day is a little harder as a single mom. I mean you still have to cook, to clean, to watch the kids. You just enjoy the day a little differently.

While I didn't get breakfast in bed (highly overrated, too many crumbs in the bed) my 7 year old made me breakfast. Interestingly. His favorite egg dish is poached (and mine also), but his sister likes scrambled. How do we solve this problem. We get a big fry pan, fill it with water, when it is boiling we add three eggs (for poached) on one side and then scramble some more eggs on the other side. Water scrambled eggs!. It could be a new trend. Add a little bacon, some cheese, some cilantro (and no salt, because the 7 year old "doesn't like salt. it's not good for you") and presto you have scrambled poached eggs. All in one pan all at the same time. I'm still not sure how he did it, but they did taste pretty good. Maybe it was all the Mive (love) in the food. Who knows.

He then put on a rock show (singing to a Wilco CD). He made a mic out of a sqaure eraser and one of those things you screw onto a pop bottle to make a tornado. Used blue painting tape and viola! a microphone. He danced around the room in a very sultry way. Jump off the chair, over the chair, off the chair backwards (let's not to that very cool thing again ), smacked my hands as he ran by the seating area (and I screamed, "oh no, he touched me. I'll never wash my hands again).

He got Gabby to join in. It's funny I was thinking it's been a while since they made a stage, got out instruments and one plays while the other runs around the "stage" and sings. IT's hilarious. I was laughing so hard my sides hurt.

We went to the botanical gardens, where they were having a plant sale. Got our pictures on the front page of the news paper (and not because Gabby was throwing a temper tantrum in from the the grocery store).

Taught Gabby to ride her bike. Got all the massive amount of recycling ready for the recycling guy. Hosni and Josh played swords. gabby wanted the training wheels put back on her bike.

They made pizza for dinner (using Jiffy mix; because you know it tastes great. It's a good company and you know mom, you can make it in a Jiffy!!). My dishwasher stopped working. But the kids were happy and looking forward to planting the raspberry bush we bought.

I think of the way we Mother. How each of us is a different Mother at different times, but the one constant, the one thing that is consistent for our kids is the love we bestow on them.

I'm curious why my 22 yr old always makes something to eat at 1 am? or midnight. Not usually earlier.

I just finished (and I read it a in its entirity) Love in Condition Yellow. A true story. It made me realize that I unconsciously live my life in condition yellow. I always have a back up plan, always know what I am going to do if someone approaches me.

some days are just bad

some days are just bad. busy, sad, and filled with experiences that i could do without. Filled with decisions I wish I wasn't making.

I wish i could really get the hang of this blog thing.

My day went like this today: People with hi K, Low K; in the end it's really all okay.

Some parents have courage that I can't imagine. And that's really all I'm saying on the subject.

Spent too much time working on projects this weekend and I am still tired. Seriously, dead dog tired.

Need to work, but really want to get the hang of the blog. I have a hard time getting into the Zone; the blog zone.

Why can't I be that person who always has a clean house.



My goals for the second half of this year (and probably of my life):

- finish reading the 500 books on my goodreads list (and really read them)

- finish de-cluttering and feng shui' ing my house

- go on a real vacation

- finish a whole beer

- go to my high school reunion

- make sure my mom gets to her 50th HS reunion (she the morbid 76 year old with an iPod touch) wants to see how many of them are 'left'

- get a new car

- get a real lawn and not just a lawn of weeds

- clean my garage

- figure out this blog thing. Some blog look so cool.

Drive

You know the song by Incubus: Drive. Alex made me a tape when I was pregnant with Hosni; that was the first time I heard Incubus. They have become one of my favorite bands.

Drive by Incubus
Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can't help but ask myself how much I let the fear
Take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before
And it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
But lately I'm beginning to find that I
Should be the one behind the wheel

I post those lyrics because I helped one of my friends paint her kitchen today. But she had a hard time deciding what color, should it be two toned, aqua or blue or both, etc. I kept telling her it was her kitchen, her house her decision. And those Incubus lyrics kept playing through my head. It made me think of times that I left someone else drive my life or decisions

and how hard it was to stop that. I started thinking about when I get the most worried about things, it really more about what others reaction will be (usually my ex-husband). I think how powerless that makes me feel and how much power that gives to others. Why isn't my decision or reaction enough?

It makes me think about how we give our personal power away by letting other make choices. It's one thing to ask an opinon, but the decision you have to own. So back to painting; after I painted the whole kitchen (while my friend did little things) she stepped back to admire it and decided the word for her kitchen was "Confident" and "Bold". She made the comment that she had not been feeling confident or bold in a long time. The deepness of the color could only indicate someone who was confident. But maybe the color suggests emerging confidence or boldness.

Well, I could write something funny, but right now I'm terribly tired. Painted my mud room and laudry room last night and today painted and primed a whole kitchen. I'm beat.

Striving to make my house as functionally fungshui as possible is more work than I imagined and has taken a long time.

bald is out

Bald is out. Now he is growing it out so he can put it in a pony tail. It bothers him (it must feel weird) when we rub it. But gosh does he look cute.
one pony, two pony, we're having some interesting hair days at my house.

unexpected lessons

it's been so long i had a hard time remembering my password!!!
been to new york and back. Kids milked cows, drove and rode tractors. Saw cousins.
heard again from Alex: loves India; hates Jaipur (too touristy??? !!!!)
My kids have gotten out the sewing machine (it's about 20 years old, but works great). They have been stitching on fabric; just shapes. Hosni made this long piece of white fabric and sewed it into a hat. He wrapped it around his head like a turban. Then he wanted to alter it to make it pointy.
He was discussing how this would happen with Josh. I was in the kitchen cooking dinner. I heard Josh say; well I don't think a pointy cap would be good. You know a long time ago people were bad (really bad) to other people. It's better now, but it still happens. They were mean to people because they were black. They picked on them. It's called racism. They wore pointy hats like you want to make. So, we don't believe in racism, so you can't change your hat to pointy. It looks cute like it is"
Hosni came into the kitchen and told me the conversation (which I heard anyway). And he said, so you know that's bad right. But I LIKE pointy hats, why can't I make one? Is that true? I said; yes it is true. They were called the Klu Klux Klan and no you can't make your hat into a pointy hat. It looked so cute when you wrapped it (around your bald little head) around your head.
But as he walked out of the kitchen I thought; amazing out of sewing some designs on white fabric and making a cap comes a lesson about the evils of racism.
and then I thought: Josh needs to be a teacher. I keep thinking about how good he is when he helps the little ones with their homework. maybe I can encourage it. Right now they think they are going to be fashion designers. (My sewing machine has NEVER gotten this much use)

We planted a lot in our garden and hopefully will get a community garden plot.

My kids school had a silent auction: we won a "fairy door" and a lot of organic seedlings (eggplants, peppers) etc. So I need more gardening space.

The summer is going to be a wet one in my back yard. Already the slip-in-slide has been out (two days), the hose attached to the slide (because simply running down the slip-n-slide is NOT fast enough), a whole bottle of dish soap used (to make you go faster on the slip-n-slide), and a lot of neighbor kids in swimsuits playing. The back yard was a huge puddle. I said no to the pool.

The back stairs are finished

Well Gabby is up for her nightly I need my mama and the kids are already begging for the airconditioning. hopefully no heart pain tonight.