Mother's Day

Mother's Day is a little harder as a single mom. I mean you still have to cook, to clean, to watch the kids. You just enjoy the day a little differently.

While I didn't get breakfast in bed (highly overrated, too many crumbs in the bed) my 7 year old made me breakfast. Interestingly. His favorite egg dish is poached (and mine also), but his sister likes scrambled. How do we solve this problem. We get a big fry pan, fill it with water, when it is boiling we add three eggs (for poached) on one side and then scramble some more eggs on the other side. Water scrambled eggs!. It could be a new trend. Add a little bacon, some cheese, some cilantro (and no salt, because the 7 year old "doesn't like salt. it's not good for you") and presto you have scrambled poached eggs. All in one pan all at the same time. I'm still not sure how he did it, but they did taste pretty good. Maybe it was all the Mive (love) in the food. Who knows.

He then put on a rock show (singing to a Wilco CD). He made a mic out of a sqaure eraser and one of those things you screw onto a pop bottle to make a tornado. Used blue painting tape and viola! a microphone. He danced around the room in a very sultry way. Jump off the chair, over the chair, off the chair backwards (let's not to that very cool thing again ), smacked my hands as he ran by the seating area (and I screamed, "oh no, he touched me. I'll never wash my hands again).

He got Gabby to join in. It's funny I was thinking it's been a while since they made a stage, got out instruments and one plays while the other runs around the "stage" and sings. IT's hilarious. I was laughing so hard my sides hurt.

We went to the botanical gardens, where they were having a plant sale. Got our pictures on the front page of the news paper (and not because Gabby was throwing a temper tantrum in from the the grocery store).

Taught Gabby to ride her bike. Got all the massive amount of recycling ready for the recycling guy. Hosni and Josh played swords. gabby wanted the training wheels put back on her bike.

They made pizza for dinner (using Jiffy mix; because you know it tastes great. It's a good company and you know mom, you can make it in a Jiffy!!). My dishwasher stopped working. But the kids were happy and looking forward to planting the raspberry bush we bought.

I think of the way we Mother. How each of us is a different Mother at different times, but the one constant, the one thing that is consistent for our kids is the love we bestow on them.

I'm curious why my 22 yr old always makes something to eat at 1 am? or midnight. Not usually earlier.

I just finished (and I read it a in its entirity) Love in Condition Yellow. A true story. It made me realize that I unconsciously live my life in condition yellow. I always have a back up plan, always know what I am going to do if someone approaches me.

some days are just bad

some days are just bad. busy, sad, and filled with experiences that i could do without. Filled with decisions I wish I wasn't making.

I wish i could really get the hang of this blog thing.

My day went like this today: People with hi K, Low K; in the end it's really all okay.

Some parents have courage that I can't imagine. And that's really all I'm saying on the subject.

Spent too much time working on projects this weekend and I am still tired. Seriously, dead dog tired.

Need to work, but really want to get the hang of the blog. I have a hard time getting into the Zone; the blog zone.

Why can't I be that person who always has a clean house.



My goals for the second half of this year (and probably of my life):

- finish reading the 500 books on my goodreads list (and really read them)

- finish de-cluttering and feng shui' ing my house

- go on a real vacation

- finish a whole beer

- go to my high school reunion

- make sure my mom gets to her 50th HS reunion (she the morbid 76 year old with an iPod touch) wants to see how many of them are 'left'

- get a new car

- get a real lawn and not just a lawn of weeds

- clean my garage

- figure out this blog thing. Some blog look so cool.

Drive

You know the song by Incubus: Drive. Alex made me a tape when I was pregnant with Hosni; that was the first time I heard Incubus. They have become one of my favorite bands.

Drive by Incubus
Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can't help but ask myself how much I let the fear
Take the wheel and steer
It's driven me before
And it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
But lately I'm beginning to find that I
Should be the one behind the wheel

I post those lyrics because I helped one of my friends paint her kitchen today. But she had a hard time deciding what color, should it be two toned, aqua or blue or both, etc. I kept telling her it was her kitchen, her house her decision. And those Incubus lyrics kept playing through my head. It made me think of times that I left someone else drive my life or decisions

and how hard it was to stop that. I started thinking about when I get the most worried about things, it really more about what others reaction will be (usually my ex-husband). I think how powerless that makes me feel and how much power that gives to others. Why isn't my decision or reaction enough?

It makes me think about how we give our personal power away by letting other make choices. It's one thing to ask an opinon, but the decision you have to own. So back to painting; after I painted the whole kitchen (while my friend did little things) she stepped back to admire it and decided the word for her kitchen was "Confident" and "Bold". She made the comment that she had not been feeling confident or bold in a long time. The deepness of the color could only indicate someone who was confident. But maybe the color suggests emerging confidence or boldness.

Well, I could write something funny, but right now I'm terribly tired. Painted my mud room and laudry room last night and today painted and primed a whole kitchen. I'm beat.

Striving to make my house as functionally fungshui as possible is more work than I imagined and has taken a long time.